Kelly Slater. No other name in the history of the ASP has inspired such awe and respect. 11 world titles. Or something around that area. Countless fans. can surf any break in the world without breaking a sweat. Bald. 42 years old and giving all of those young spring chickens a run for their money. And his secret? Yep. You got it. Vodka Manberries.
You see, before every heat, Kelly would slurp down some sweet red victory juice. He’s been doing it his whole career. Gives him the confidence and sugar boost that he needs. Like Vodka Manberries are known to do.
And his recent achievement, the 720 aerial that many are calling “the best air of all time,” “not too shabby,” and “crisp” was due to the often maligned beverage as well. You see, after the first 360 degrees, Slater was feeling down. He felt like giving up. He felt like there was no way he could do another rotation. But then he whipped out a VM from his secret compartment in his wetsuit, necked it, and the rest is history. 720 degrees of glory.
Let that be a lesson to ye. If you drink what makes you feel good, you will prevail. Thank you Kelly, for letting me share you story.
Grab life by the manberries.