Welcome to Vodka Manberry

vodkamanerry

Beer.

It’s brown, it’s bitter, and for some reason, it’s the height of manliness. Nothing is more manly than a guy covered in dirt in a high vis vest sculling a schooner of VB and wiping the froth off his mouth with a grime covered hand and a content sigh.

But there’s one other thing about beer that I’m sure a lot of guys will agree with, but are too afraid to mention.

It really doesn’t taste that good.

In fact, it tastes like you’ve got a mouth full of socks that your Dad just went jogging in even though you told him he needs to wear shoes as well but he just told you to go to your room and get back to your kite designing.

But if you even think about getting a cider, a wine, or, god forbid, a vodka anything, you will be chastised by men and women alike for not being a man. You’ll get laughed at, you’ll get insulted, and you’ll get your little umbrella thrown to the ground and stomped by a King Gee work boot.

But is’t being a man about being confident in who you are? Shouldn’t you be able to order a vodka cranberry without telling the hot female bartender that it’s for your grandma? Shouldn’t you be able to order whatever drink you want without getting verbally and emotional shredded by your friends, family, and pets?

Well I say yes. I say it’s time to make a change. It’s time to show the world that we can look manly no matter what we drink. So pour yourself a vodka cranberry – sorry, MANberry – and show us your confidence and manliness.

Grab life by the Manberries.

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2 comments

  1. Very true! I work in a bar and very VERY rarely will a guy ever order a vodka cranberry, or any other drink that could diminish his manliness. I’ve even heard guys calling out other guys for drinking pear cider for god’s sake, calling them ‘big fairy’ and other terms that I won’t repeat on this public forum. Sometimes I can even spot the disgust on some men’s faces as they drink their schooner of Tooheys New, gazing jealously at their girlfriend’s perfectly made Cosmopolitan drink (not to toot my own horn or anything).

    We shouldn’t bash anyone for their drink choice! Vodka Cranberry’s are particularly delicious with a wedge of lime. From now on I will promote that drink to any man who asks for my drink recommendation.

    Like

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